First of all, the open call for blog authors is still in effect. I've invited our first author besides me, also an INFP, and I'm eager to read what she writes -- in particular, to learn about career issues in her part of the world, and how they're different from here in the US. So that's what's coming up soon.
Meanwhile, if you'd like to write here, just post a comment and I'll set you up.
Now to those mixed feelings. I'm still very excited about the degree of autonomy that my day job is offering me, enough to feel night-and-day much happier than I was a couple of months ago. I even moved!
But I still have a consciousness that coding all day just isn't my calling. It's a lot more manageable because I'm only doing it 30 hours a week and I can take more frequent breaks or arrange my day how I wish. But it's still like... well, I'm not sure how to describe it. I can make myself focus for certain periods of time (maybe 2-4 hours, tops) and solve a technical problem that needs to be solved, but it requires a Herculean effort to stay on task. It's satisfying when I grind it out, but only in the sense that running several miles might feel satisfying when you're done with it.
I'm also getting a little antsy wrapping up a task, because I feel like my boss really doesn't even know what I'm doing in the day-to-day. He wants to see daily deliverables, which would be fine, except I'm not sure he really understands when the task calls for some sort of research and troubleshooting that doesn't show up on a nice neat Web page. To be honest I'm not really sure how much he understands about technical management.
I dunno, I still think I'm in the wrong career. Fortunately all that work done to choose a new one isn't for naught, as I'll be able to start putting together grad school apps around August-September.
The poker's going quite well, incidentally. I'm playing about 15-20 hours a week and winning at a rate that would be pretty good for a temp job. I'm not yet ready to take the plunge into playing full-time because I like having insurance paid for, I like not worrying that a week or two of downswing will sap my motivation to play, and I like knowing that I have some experience to put on the resume. But if something were to happen to my day job, or if I wanted to leave to take a contract job here where I'm living, it would be nice to have my poker bankroll pretty stable and being built up week by week.
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